Hey you! Yeah, you, the proud Scottsdale-ian reading this. Has the spirit of Scottsdale ever winked at you from a street corner? Or have you simply stomped along the sidewalks of your town, eyes glazed over, and stubbornly immune to the whimsical twang of your city? Well folks, it’s time to spark up that local patriotism and reclaim Scottsdale in all its glory like you’re out-of-towners!
Once a local, now a tourist!
Don’t feel embarrassed; we’re all guilty of it. Us Scottsdalerians cozy up to our routine like a cactus to arid sunshine, never daring to swan dive into the bucket of touristy fun that is so brazenly dumped on our doorsteps. But buddy, it doesn’t have to go down like this.
You don’t need to painstakingly book a ticket to Cancun for all that touristy rush when you can play amateur explorer right here, in the midst of massively underrated local landmarks. Did you just smirk and say ‘What? Scottsdale?’. Hold on to your hiking boots, amigo, because it’s time to unveil our grand city’s uncharted territories.
Dive right into the Scottsdale Experience
Start with the ever-so-bustling Old Town Scottsdale. Rumor has it that there’s an ice cream flavor there that tastes exactly like a mailbox at midday in peak July. Whether that’s true or not, you’re bound to find a flavor that hits your tastebuds in all the right places, and the sheer variety might just make you weep sweet vanilla tears.
And if the burning desire to properly play tourist still feels unquenched, take a stroll to nearby Fifth Avenue and shop for Native American Jewelry. Who knows, perhaps you’ll find a turquoise bolo tie that really brings out the color of your eyes.
But don’t forget the real gem in our crown – the Scottsdale’s Museum of Contemporary Art. Be cautioned, however, the art here doesn’t just “speak to you,” it yells, whispers, sings, sometimes barks, and occasionally mimes a Shakespearean sonnet, all in the same visit.
Get Sporty, Get Local, Get Vacaying!
Now I dare you to venture a little further, and by further, I mean not just genetically-19-minutes away to our local semi-celebrity: The Giants Spring Training Facility. Rub elbows (or at least try to) with baseball’s finest as you catch a game. Also, don’t leave without munching on a nacho hat- it’s like a nacho plate, but importantly, it’s a hat! Alright, I made that up, but wouldn’t it be a great idea?
And hey, if you’re even thinking of leaving without trekking the Scottsdale McDowell Sonoran Preserve, you might as well mail your adventurous spirit to the North Pole, because you sure aren’t using it. This 30,000-acre land is out there all pristine and alluring, and it’s practically beckoning you. I can imagine it saying, “Come and hike me. Come, explore the peace of 200 trails amidst me. Or, you know, just bring a picnic and inflatable flamingo, totally up to you!”
Concluding our Glorious City-tour Saga
As daylight fades and the desert horizon bleeds into a state of fuchsia pink (because our sunsets are undoubtedly the extra teenager of nature), indulge in local culinary delights. ‘Hey there! How about ending your day with the best mole poblano in town?’ says the seductive waft from Barrio Queen in Old Town. You can almost hear the sizzling fajita platter applaud your choice.
Remember, you live in Scottsdale. This land of quirk plastered amidst a desert canvas, making it less of an irony and more of a masterpiece, is yours. So wear your grandpa’s bucket hat and tropical-print shirt, slather on that SPF 50 sunscreen, strap on fanny packs, and take Scottsdale by storm…the storm of a wild Scottsdale-ian roaming its turf. For after all, folks, we are all but tourists in the grand scheme of the universe, and Scottsdale…Scottsdale is our playground. Happy Touristing!